WARNING --- NWS CONTENT BELOW ---
In mid-2008 I started trying to sell Beast. I put a few ads up on Ebay and on Craigslist but I didn't see any real results.
I got a little frustrated with the amount of really stupid questions I was getting on the sale and figured that a
change of pace was what I needed. I created a funny Craigslist ad that I hoped would become viral and spread around
some of the racing forums. All that really happened was that the ad was pulled from Craigslist every time I posted it. I
am not sure why they pulled it because I have seen a lot worse on there. I guess with PC Police took offense to it. Anyway,
I have preserved it here.
AGAIN, THERE IS NWS CONTENT BELOW. VIEW AT YOUR OWN RISK!
LIGHTWEIGHT TURBOCHARGED 1991 MIATA RACECAR - $4500
Yes, I am selling my pride and joy. The car that I have sweated my ass off while building over the last 5 years. During that time I have gashed my head open, busted my knuckles, dripped oil in my eyes, and racked my shins on the lift while getting this car as light and as fast as I can. Why am I selling it? Because my wife thinks her precious new car should sit in the garage while mine sits outside with stray dogs pissing on it. Yeah, urine does wonders for racing slicks. It makes me sick to my stomache to think one of you homos will be out on the track in my car while I sit here nutless with her on the couch watching Oprah. I tried selling it on Ebay but let's face it - you guys wouldn't know a good deal if it was jammed up your ass sideways. I actually had multiple people bidding less than $1000 for this thing. Are you guys fucking stupid? I've also advertised it on Craigslist before and it seems like you guys just don't get it. It is a fucking race car for Christ's sake!
Q: How much mileage does it get?
A: How the fuck should I know and why should I give a shit! If you want to spend the weekend driving your "room mate" across state line to complete his sex change operation then this is probably the wrong car for you.
Q: Can I use it as a daily driver?
A: Are you stoned or something? I guess if you want to drive a car with no A/C, no PS, no windows/top/wipers/heat back and forth to work to be look cool you could try. The truth is that you are still a loser though and the car won't help. No wonder you didn't get that promotion to assistant night manager at Waffle House.
Q: Is that the gas tank in the trunk?
A: Hey dumbshit, the caption above the picture says that it is a reservoir tank for the water injection. That didn't stop the questions so I put text on the picture that clearly states this THREE TIMES and I still get asked. I swear to God that if I get asked that one more time I am going to start shooting.
Q: I have a Honda that is really fast.
A: Sure you do! I don't know why you are emailing to tell me this but I don't give a fuck. My car will run circles around your peice of shit. I don't understand why you guys come up to me on the street and want to race. You have a big air filter on a bone stock engine and a coffee can sized chrome tip bolted on the end of your stock exhaust. Yeah, your car is really fucking fast! You see my exhaust? No you don't because it is a cherry bomb that dumps under the car. It is for airflow not show.
Q: Does the car have a turbo timer? I met a guy once who had one and he is now my hero.
A: No, I don't need a turbo timer because the turbo is water cooled. Stop with the turbo timer bullshit already. The car doesn't have a turbo timer, huge tach on the dash, stupid fucking wings on the back, or any APC stickers on it. That shit does not make your car fast and only makes you look like a douche.
Q: dUdE, dOeS yOuR sIcK rIdE hAvE NAWZ?
A: Shut the fuck up! Your mother should have aborted you!
Q: Tell me more about your car.
A: Holy fuck, someone actually asking a real question! Go to my website www.lightweightmiata.com and look at the description and hundreds of pictures I took while building the car. If you still have questions drop me an email and I can answer anything you need to know.
20K MILES ON CRATE SHORTBLOCK & LOW COMP PISTONS
REBUILT HEAD, 3 ANGLE VALVE JOB, PORTED AND POLISHED
TORSEN REAR END WITH LATE MODEL SUBFRAME
FLYIN’ MIATA LINK FULL REPLACMENT PROGRAMMABLE ECU WITH 550 INJECTORS
DUAL FEED FUEL RAIL
FRESHLY REBUILT AND COATED T25/28 HYBRID TURBO
GREDDY TYPE-S BLOW OFF VALVE
FLYIN’ MIATA A/A INTERCOOLER
DEVIL’S OWN WATER INJECTION
CUSTOM FREE FLOWING EXHAUST
KYB AGX SHOCKS AND RACING SPRINGS
HARD DOG ROLL BAR
COMPETITION MOTOR MOUNTS
NEW WATER PUMP, TIMING BELT, OIL PUMP
LIGHT AND BALANCED FLYWHEEL
JACKSON RACING STAGE 1 CLUTCH
ALL METAL RADIATOR
PARALLEL COOLING FANS
STAINLESS BRAIDED BRAKE AND CLUTCH LINES
AXXIS ULTIMATE BRAKE PADS
TWO SETS OF STREET AND TRACK TIRES/WHEELS
Currently has Kumho Ecsta V700 215/50R13's on it for autocross
GRANT GT STEERING WHEEL, CUSTOM SHORT SHIFTER
ROLL BAR CAMERA MOUNTS AND RACING HARNESS
OVER 400 POUNDS OF WEIGHT REMOVED
MOST OF THE ENGINE WORK WAS DONE IN THE PAST 20K MILES. EVERYTHING ELSE WAS DONE IN THE PAST 5K MILES
CAR COMES WITH A LAPTOP COMPUTER (tablet PC) FOR TUNING
No, this is not the gas tank. It is a water tank for the water injection: